Mother Knows Best

Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Not mine...
Spoilers: None
Pairing: Jack/Liz
Summary: The mothers observe. This is the most recent installment of that one series where Liz gets injured. Enjoy! 

"Hello, mother," Jack said. 
"This is wonderful. Absolutely wonderful!" Colleen exclaimed.
"Hey, Jack. I better go. The writers are getting pretty loud down there. Um, nice seeing you again, Colleen."
After Liz closed the door, Colleen kept smiling at Jack.
"What do you want, Colleen?"
"When are you gonna propose to her, Jacky boy?"
Jack spit his drink out.
"Excuse me?"
"Propose. You know, the thing you've done to many women in the past."
"Mother, Liz and I just started dating."
"Would you call 7 months just starting?"
"Actually, yes."
"How? You've proposed to women you've barely even known a month!"
Jack stood up from his chair.
"Liz is different, mother!"
"How so?"
"Are you on my side or what?"
"I didn't notice there were any sides."
Jack sighed, then sat back down.
"Liz...she makes me feel happy. Makes me feel complete. She knows everything about me and I'm comfortable around her. She's beautiful. I think I've actually found the one."
Colleen smiled.
"Okay. I'm not gonna force you into marrying her or scold you for having sex before marriage. You wanna know why? Two reasons. I did that...and because Liz is a good person. I know she won't leave you, Jack. You're right. She probably is the one for you. I'm not even gonna nag you or whatever. I'll stay away and only visit you on holidays...unless Liz calls."
Jack hugged Colleen.
"Thank you."
"I think you've finally got it, Jacky," she said, before leaving. 
"Jonathan?" Jack called out.
"Yes, sir?"
"Can you please get Margaret and Dick Lemon on the phone, please?"
"Right away, sir."
*
Margaret gasped.
"You're dating my Lizzie?" she asked.
"I hope that's not a bad thing...but yes, I am."
"No, no! It's not a bad thing at all! Why, I was just talking to Liz earlier and I invited her to go here on Friday! Would you be interested in joining us?"
"Why, of course. Anything for you, Margaret."
"Liz sure picked a good gentleman. Well, I suppose I should go. You're taking care of business stuff, so I'll see you two on Friday."
Jack hung up the phone and went back to work.
*
Coming close to midnight, Liz went to his office. She  went behind his desk and put her arms around him.
"Hey. Don't work late. Come on, let's go home."
Jack kissed her and rubbed his eyes. 
"I have to finish this. It's something for tomorrow."
"Is it really more important than me?" Liz asked, with her cute face. 
Jack turned his light off, put his papers in a folder, stored them in his desk, and stood up.
"Shall we?" he asked, smiling.
Liz's eyes were starting to close. 
"I'll carry you," Jack said.
"No, it's fine. I'll just--Oh!" 
"Hang on to me."
Jack carried her and went for the elevator. When they reached the lobby, he put her down in one of the couches and went to the reception desk.
"Hey, Lenny. Can you do me a favor?" Jack asked the receptionist.
"Sure thing, Mister Donaghy. What will it be?"
Jack looked at Liz.
"Can you book us a flight to Hawaii?"
*
When Liz woke up, she was in a hotel. She knew it couldn't be her apartment...or Jack's. 
"Jack?" she called out.
No reply.
"Jack? Honey?" she called out again.
"I'm in here!" Jack said, sticking his head out of the restroom with a toothbrush in his mouth.
Liz went to the restroom and gave him a hug.
"Hi," she said.
Jack waved at her and smiled.
"Where are we?"
"I think you should take a look outside."
Liz went out of the restroom and into the balcony. She gasped.
"HAWAII?!"
"You like it?" Jack hollered.
"I love it! But what about work?"
"Eh. Pete's got it handled. We're only going to be staying here for two days since we have a flight to Whitehaven, Pennsylvania Wednesday night."
"How did you--"
"I called Margaret yesterday. You know, to tell her about us."
Liz sighed.
"So what should we do?" she asked him.
"Get out your swimsuit. We're going swimming."
"But I don't have a--"
"Check your suitcase."
Liz gasped as she saw what Jack had bought for her.
*
So, there was no one at the beach. Her leg was okay and everything seemed to be looking pretty good. This was her time to try something. When she got in the water, she took her swimsuit off and put them in her bag. She waited for Jack to get in the water. 
"Why are you all the way back there at the deep end?" Jack asked. 
"Take your shorts off!" she hollered.
"Take my..? Why?"
"Just do it! It'll be fun!"
Jack took his shorts off and swam to where Liz was. 
Liz put her arms around him and kissed him.
"Skinny dipping," she said, smiling. 
Jack gasped, his eyes widening.
"My, my, Elizabeth! I did not know you were one to approve for such events like this!" Jack exclaimed.
"Let's do it...here. In the water," she told him.
Jack kissed her.
"I love you," he told her.
Liz looked at him.
"I'm sorry. Too soon?" he asked her.
"No, no. I was just surprised that you said it first. I love you too, Jack. A lot."
"Which is why we're doing this right now, yes?"
Liz nodded.
"Good. I love you more than anything in this world."
"More than business? More than family?"
"Of course. You're my lover."
"You know it," she said, before kissing him.
*
When they got back to shore and put their swimsuits back on, Liz sat in one of the beach chairs. She took out her iPod and began listening to music while she was getting a tan. Her shades were on, she was drinking a piña colada in one hand and she was holding Jack's hand in the other. Meanwhile, Jack was doing the complete opposite. He was reading some book about politics and had the shaded area, since he already got an artificial tan before they got here. 
"Liz Lemon?" a man said.
Liz put her piña colada down and looked at the man.
"It's me, Andrew Baird!"
"Oh my god, Drew?"
"Yeah!"
Liz stood up and hugged him.
"How are you?" he asked her.
"I'm great! What about you?"
"Same. Hey, what are you doing here in Hawaii anyway?"
"Just getting some R & R. You?"
"Vacation. Wow, you look great! Would you like to have a drink later?"
Before Liz could answer, Jack was already next to her.
"My God. Jack Donaghy, is that you?"
Jack smiled and shook his hand.
"What are you doing here?" Drew asked him.
"Oh, I'm actually here with my girlfriend," he said, pointing to Liz.
"You guys are together? Ah, I see. Well, congrats, Jack. You picked a good girl. I'll see you two later."
When they sat back down, Liz's stomach began to rumble.
"Let's go get some food," she said.
*
They went back to their hotel room and got dressed. Liz wore a casual dress, while Jack wore his tux. 
"We look good," Liz said, looking at both of them in the mirror. 
When they got to the restaurant, Liz was surprised at how it looked just like a restaurant in New York.
"This place is amazing! What's it called?" Liz asked him.
"Plunder. They have it in all 50 states, including Puerto Rico."
They ate, talked and laughed for at least an hour and a half. 
"Oh my God, I remember that! Yeah, it was so--Oh, hang on. My phone's ringing."
Liz took the call.
"Jenna?"
"Hey, it's Jenna."
"Yeah, I know. Why'd you call?"
"Oh, I just wanted to see how you and Jack were doing in Hawaii."
"We're doing completely fine, Jenna. Okay, bye."
"Oh, am I interrupting something? Are you and Jack having sex right now? Is it awesome, mind-blowing sex?"
"Jenna!" Liz yelled, but not too loudly so that the whole restaurant would look at her.
"But seriously, though. How's the sex?"
"Lots. Tons. Mind-blowing. The best. Okay, now I gotta go. Jack says hi. Okay, bye."
Liz cleared her throat and ate her food. 
"Jack? Is that you?" a woman said.
Jack turned to look at the woman.
"C.C.? Good God! How the hell are ya?" he asked.
"I'm doing well. How are you?"
"Oh, I'm here with my girlfriend. Liz Lemon, remember her?"
"You and her?" she asked him.
Jack nodded.
C.C. smiled.
"That's really awesome. Liz, it was nice seeing you. Well, I should go. Orange babies to see."
When Jack sat back down, Liz was picking on her food.
"Hey, what's wrong?" he asked, reaching for her hand.
"What? Oh, nothing. I just kinda miss...home. As much as I love this and all, I still miss the crazy hectics of my work life."
Jack sighed.
"I was waiting for you to say that. So, Whitehaven or New York?"
"Hang on. Are you mad?"
"No, I'm relieved. I can't handle vacations, either."
"Then why'd we go here in the first place?"
Jack laughed.
"Honestly?"
Liz nodded. 
"For sex. I mean, it's pretty quiet in here, don't you think? And so you could relax and all."
Liz slapped him playfully on the arm.
"You used Hawaii for sex? With me?! Come on, Jack. I'm not that great."
"I beg to differ."
"I'm not the greatest sex person in the world! I can't do all those...tricks."
"That is true, yes. But, in this sexual situation, I'm still the mentor and you are the mentee. Why, just earlier, you initiated sex when I didn't even ask. You're learning."
"Now do you want to initiate sex...on a plane?"
"Let's go get your suitcases, shall we?" Jack said.
Liz laughed.
"Why must you always be so horny?" she asked.
"Have you looked in the mirror today?" 
Liz blushed.
*
"Jack, you know we can't have sex in my parents' house."
Jack turned to look at her.
"Excuse me?"
"I wasn't the type of girl who had sex in her room when her parents were gone. It'd be kind of like sneaking cocaine in there. I just...I'm not used to doing that."
Jack sighed.
"Let's put your condoms away, okay? Please. For me?"
Jack was silent.
"How horny are you anyway?"
"Very."
"Well, you'll just have to settle for cuddling. I'm sorry. Maybe when we get back, okay?"
Jack nodded, but in his head, he planned something else.
*
Jack had to admit, the weekend with the Lemon family wasn't so bad. It was calming, actually. The only thing that Jack disapproved of was the "no sex" rule Liz made up.
Who makes that kind of rule?
Doesn't everyone love to have sex? Especially with a man as talented as him?
After one long night of total bonding, Liz went to her room and followed. Once he entered, he locked the door. Liz was pretty tired, so he figured he could give her a massage, tell her soothing things, and see how it goes from there. 
Liz got dressed, and laid down on the bed. Jack told her to get up.
"Why? I'm tired, Jack."
"I want to give you a massage. You had a busy day today."
Liz smiled, then nodded.
Jack massaged her shoulders for a little while.
"Do you think I'm a bad writer?" she asked him.
"No, Liz. You're one of the only talented writers in New York City."
Liz chuckled. After taking his hands off her shoulders, Jack kissed her neck.
"Jack, I--"
"I know. Tired. This is going to be really quick, promise."
"Pinky promise?" Liz said, holding out her pinky.
Jack hesitated at first, but did so anyway.
"You're the best. If I fall asleep, then we could just cuddle."
"I appreciate that, Lemon. But I want you to stay awake the whole time."
"But we--"
"Just do the best you can."
Liz snorted.
"You sound like my second grade teacher."
Jack signaled her to shush.
"Oh, that feels good."
*
The next morning, Liz was fixing the bed and making her room nice and tidy. Jack came out of the restroom with a smile on his face.
"What?" Liz asked.
"You're beautiful."
Liz laughed.
"Thanks."
She gave him a quick kiss before going to the kitchen to fix breakfast.
"Liz! You're up early," Margaret said.
"This is our last day here. We...well, I, wanted to cook breakfast for you guys."
"Where's Jack?"
"Oh, he's in the room getting dressed."
Liz tried to act cool and calm to not give away the fact that her and Jack had sex last night (and this morning in the shower).
Margaret left the kitchen and Liz grabbed the ingredients to a perfect breakfast.
Liz was mixing when Jack came up behind her and kissed her cheek.
"What you got there?" he asked.
"An omelet."
"Any significance?" Jack asked, grinning.
"You ask so many questions. This is actually for you. Remember after that first night we had sex? The next morning, you gave me an omelet, so...there's the significance."
"What are you going to cook for your parents?"
"Toaster waffles."
Jack burst out laughing.
"You're going to give me, your boyfriend, the better breakfast?"
"They're not gonna care, Jack. Besides, they think everything I do is special."
*
After breakfast, Liz was sitting in the living room watching TV with Jack.
"Liz? Can you help me with these pancakes?" Margaret asked.
"Oh, um...sure, mom. I thought you finished."
"Oh, I did. I just wanted to eat some more."
Liz put the butter and syrup on the pancakes, then Margaret gave her something.
"Oh, I think this is Jack's," Margaret said, giving Liz something she didn't want her mother seeing.
"Um...I'll make sure to give this to him."
Liz went back to the living room and signaled Jack to go to the restroom.
"What?" he asked.
Liz gave him the condom wrapper.
"There's nothing in here."
"Well, duh! That's the one from last night, you moron! My mom saw it!"
Jack laughed.
"What is so funny?!" she asked him.
"You're guilty!"
"Yeah. So?"
"Liz, listen to me. You're a grown woman. You're not always going to be their little girl. They knew this was coming, so get over yourself."
Liz took a deep breath.
"Why do you have to be so handsome?" Liz said before kissing him.
*
"New York! HOME!!! Finally!" Liz screamed, as she walked in Jack's (their) apartment.
Jack kissed her.
"Now?" Liz asked.
"No one can see us now. It's not like Margaret is here."
"Can we do this later? Please? I just want to sit down on the couch for a second."
Jack followed her to the couch.
After a few hours of sitting and watching movies, Liz fell asleep. It was about 10 at night when Jack woke her up.
"Wha--why? Oh, hi Jack."
Jack smiled.
"Hey, Lemon."
Liz laughed.
"It's been a while since you called me Lemon. What's up?"
"Well, this isn't exactly how I planned on doing this, but I feel like I should."
Jack pulled out a small box.
Liz's eyes widened.
"Marry me, Elizabeth?"
"Hm...give me reasons. It's only been seven months after all."
Jack was startled. He didn't know that he was supposed to have a speech prepared. He knew that his words would affect both their lives, so he decided to make them count.
"Elizabeth, I know we've only been seeing each other for seven months, but we've been friends for six long years. The day I saw you, I knew there were sparks flying...literally. A piece of cement fell on your head and it was a magical moment. I have dated other women in the past, but if it weren't for you, I would've been divorced ten times already. Remember that night after Gerhardt's party? I was going to kiss you. But I respected you, so I didn't. I've always loved you. Those women were just a distraction so I could fill the void in my heart. You make me laugh. You enjoy the tiniest things I do for you. Your whole face lights up whenever someone mentions my name. I'm glad that I get to see your face every day. I couldn't imagine a day without you. You are the best part of my day, Liz. This is probably the best seven months of my life. Actually, the best six years. So, I ask you again: Will you marry me, Elizabeth?"
Liz hugged Jack.
"Of course."
Jack smiled.
"Really? Good, because I didn't have my "no" speech planned."
Liz laughed.
"You thought I was going to say no to your adorable face?"
Liz kissed Jack, and from outside the window, Colleen said,
"Mother knows best! I knew you could do it, Jacky! I knew you--"
Liz closed the window. 
"Grandchildren Avenue!" Colleen yelled.

END